I am not human.

Okay, so innerslytherin and I write just way too damn fast together. We've handed off our 130K Morgan/Reid monster fic to a beta we trust, but since completing that, we have gone on to write over 60K worth of fic that we're just sort of... sitting on. We need a beta.

Knowledge of Criminal Minds fandom would be fantastic, but as I have very few people on the flist from that fandom right now, a general SPAG/consistency beta would be just fine. There are about 6 fics (I think), four connecting Morgan/Reid fics (approx 10k on the first 3 fics, and 20k on the 4th), a Hotch/Reid fic (about 13k), and an as-yet-unfinished Hotch/Morgan fic (that is over 7k now, and may very well turn into a Hotch/Morgan/Reid series *headesk*). Most of them are porny, but not kinky.

Any takers on any of them? Drop me a comment, or email me at severity.s@gmail.com.

innerslytherin likes Hotch/Reid now. I win.

That is all.

[/gloating]

Had a nice little lol whilst working on a CM ficlet just now...

...Reid pushed himself up, his hand fumbling on the body lying in front of him to aim his bun at the unsub...


We is 2 b defeeting zee serial killerz with pastries nao! YUM! :DDDDD


The small cake hit its target and ricocheted off the back of the unsub's head. "Ows!" he yelped, turning back to glare at Reid. "That hurt!"

"Ya, I no," Reid sed.

"Siriusly, what was that? Day old?" the unsub demanded.

Reid smirked. "Ya, sucks 4 u, huh? Nao come 2 b arrested pls."


*cough* >.> I am clearly in need of more sleep.

I just broke 60k on my lmom fic! Woot!

Also, randomly, I now have Hopelessly Devoted to You from Grease stuck in my head. I'm not sure yet if that's better or worse than Umbrella. I think I might still need a lobotomy.

Poll #1809 Epilogue in different voice?
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

You just read over 60K of fic with 3rd person narration. You get to the epilogue and suddenly it's first person narration. Your reaction:

I may wrestle my LMOM Epilogue into submission because it might be weird in first person, and I've never actually written first person before... but damn it, I just keep hearing it that way in my head when I think about the end of this fic. Yikes. :/

Writing a crossover for tonight, and tomorrow's as well. Thought I'd take a poll on tomorrow's, as I'm undecided. :P

Poll #1787 Who should Remus fuck next?
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

What crossover character should Remus fuck next?

ETA: And of course I meant Brian, not Brain. *headdesk*

ETA2: Over 2k and no porn yet tonight. wtf?

*types* Peter had probably eaten more rice pudding with his dinner than he should have.

*goes off on intarwebz in search of rice pudding recipes for nearly an hour instead of getting this sex scene started*

ETA: omg how did I get from googling rice pudding to Ron Jeremy? Porn, porn, I think I was trying to get back to the porn... and didn't... *headdesk*

Average words per sentence: 14
Maximum words per sentence: 55

WHAT?! I don't honestly have a sentence in this thing that's 55 words, do I? How is that even possible?! I mean, I'm good at run-ons, but I don't think I'm that good.

I need a beta for my Merry Smutmas fic! It's due Nov. 9th, and I'll have the final edits done today so I can send it out by tonight. There are some warnings, but I'd prefer to say them via email, just so I don't give away anything about what I wrote/who I wrote for in a public forum. If you're interested, let me know and I'll give you all the details! :)

*fly-by hugs to the flist*

The working title I just gave the fic I am writing at the moment:

Let's Beat Up On Remus Lupin For A Few Thousand Words, Mkay?

...I might keep it. I think it's catchy.

Oh, and when the hood of your car is all bowed up like a parachute, it's really easy for the wind to try and push you off the road. *sigh*

...a meme ganked from bratanimus, because it looked fun!

Leave a comment to ask any of my characters, from any of my stories, any question you want, and "they" will answer you! (Warning: there may be story spoilers in these comments.)

I will also add to that, you may ask any of my RP characters, past and present, anything you'd like as well (and, just for fun, if you play with me now or have ever played with me, feel free to let your characters ask my characters questions, if you are so inclined).

It is sad that I have RP pr0n to be written and I'm at work. And speaking of RP, I am pretty much in love with thedressingroom (on LJ, I jsut now realised there was one here too!) Where else could I call some random Remus Lupin "YOU WONDERFUL QUEER"? Seriously. Win!

...Well, I took the advice of many of you that replied to my iPod emergency, but alas and alack, Eileen the iPod is dead. Utterly. She flashes the little apple logo at me when I try to turn her on, and then it fades and hangs there for a bit before dying again. Poor baby. Sad thing is, I don't even know if she had a warranty, and if so, how to prove I've had her less than a year as I kept no original paperwork. *sigh* It was sheer luck that I got her last Christmas just before my car's CD player stopped working, and had been using her as my only source of driving music since January. Now I am stuck with radio, which is just as bad and repetative as I'd rememebered. There is no Rasputina, and not nearly enough NIN for my liking! ...And, btw, when did Nirvana become "classic rock"? No, no, no, no, WRONG... I feel old.

Other random things... Still no progress on either SnuSa of merry_smutmas. In fact, I think I've taken a backwards step when it comes to SnuSa. :P ...I get to babysit tonight! ...I spent way too much time randomly contemplating ant sex and having Hava Nagila stuck in my head yesterday (those are unrelated, btw XD ...and, damn it, the song's back now!). ...And I have a pain in my foot that feels like someone is shoving a dull nail through the heel every time I stand on it... I think that's about it. Oh, and:

Dear GJ, please to be letting me edit journal entries now, kthnzbai.

This is either a sinus infection, or an allergy attack, the likes of which I have never seen before. I've already called in to work tomorrow and made myself a doctor appointment. Not to mention I've just started my period yesterday (so, if I've been a bitch to anyone, sorry), and I just now, in my haze, slammed my toes into a wall so hard that I'm bleeding and I spent several minutes in tears. *pets ice pack*

Sooooo, my days off have been lovely.

I should be writing, or at least doing a final edit on that dub-con snupin fic I asked for betas for, but my brain won't work. I've just spent the last day and a half in a fog, putzing around on the computer without even getting on to chat. :/ *toddles off to open dub-con fic to try to edit*

OMG I NEED TO BE WRITING FEST FICS, NOT FEEDING SNAPE/LUPIN/NEVILLE BUNNIES!!!

*flings self off cliff*

Calling betas! ;) Firstly, I'm putting this at the top, because the rest of this will probably get a bit tl;dr. *g* Neither of the people I'd normally ask to beta will touch this, so I need a beta! Snupin, dub-con (that, in the interest of full disclosure, starts out as non-con), mwpp era (post-prank), with a dark!Remus. It's pretty short (less than 1500 words right now, though I do intend to flesh it out as much as possible, before sending it out. I doubt it will get over 3000, though, if even that.) Any takers?

The last few days have been exhausting. Have I mentioned I hate football season in Tennessee? ( working the football weekend, complete with phone ghosts and real fire! )

I'm glad I have today and tomorrow off, though I just feel tired today. I was restless all last night. I couldn't sleep well and I think I was talking in my sleep. I distinctly remember trying to ask my husband, through a haze of deep sleep, "Do you think if my Snape was taller, he would act differently?" Which... is weird... and amusing because why am I thinking of my RP!Snape in my sleep? Then I woke up at 7:30 with such a pressing feeling of anxiousness that I got out of bed to come and make sure there wasn't anybody in my apartment that shouldn't be and checking the door locks before going back to sleep. O.o

I'm just hoping I can catch up on my rest and get some writing done this "weekend." I still have only the vaguest idea for SnuSa. It's sort of there, but I have no exact plot and I'm trying to figure out how to get the ending appropriately hopeful. I'm planning to slip off to Borders today to write a bit out and maybe an idea will gel doing that. *crosses fingers*

Hmmm, semagic says it can't connect anywhere, but I can connect regularly. Anyone know why?

Things to do tomorrow:

1. omg, cleeeeeaaan.
2. finish making beta notes on cross-dressing!Neville fic and send back to mosaic
3. Post RP thread
4. possibly send email, depending on how I feel tomorrow
5. go to Borders and write/plot snusa ans merry_smutmas, or flesh out Oct d_d post
6. re-commit to diet fully. Jeeze, get in gear, woman. Don't blow what you've done so far.
7. Relax because it's a fucking huge football weekend here and I'm going to want to kill someone at work Saturday. (God, I hate football. I hate it even more now that I live here and work in hospitality... Fucking UT.)

P.S. Tim Gunn getting emotional, makes me weepy. (btw, the guy on the show just said "there was not a dry tear in the room." DRY TEAR?!?!?! O.o)

P.P.S. Re weepiness and #4.. I think I have major PMS. At least I hope, so that I will have a damn excuse. Fuck.

One fic out of three? TOTALLY PWNED.

As in DONE. FINISHED. HA! ...Well, it's a little bare and brief, but if I let it sit for a week and come back to it, I can flesh it out a bit and it'll be all good. :)

Wrote a couple hundred words of my SnuSa... but I have NO CLUE how to get it to do what I need it to do, or how to write it or... anything, really, other than what prompt I want unless I throw this out and start over. Aye aye aye... Merry_smutmas... er? Oy vey... *MOPS BROWS*

By the way, Borders only has TWO seats near an outlet to plug in my laptop. One lets you sit with your back to the wall. I did not get that seat. It was sort of weird writing explicit porn knowing someone could be looking over my shoulder. PLUS, two guys who sat next to me while I was there? One had a long talk on the phone. I know it's not a library, but that annoys me to no end when people have normal volume conversations right next to people obvilously WRITING PR0N doing work (laptop, homework, etc.) And he kept calling the person on the other end a RAPSCALLION. WHO USES THAT WORD ANYMORE?! Then the other guy? Falls alseep doing that twitching thing some people do as they drift off and started SNORING right next to me. ARGH!

Still though. I WIN.

I LIKE CAPS TONIGHT! *FLAIL* I TO BE STOPPING SPAMMING YOU NOW! now to go RP post and get offline for the night!

Remember my last post, oh, a little over three hours ago? Remember how I said "I must force myself off the internet and write. No RP, nothing until I get at least a couple thousand words of fic out"?What have I done in the last few hours?

1.Paced the apartment about a hundred times (I do that sometimes, not always out of stress, either. Some weird OCD thing, I guess, and occasionally ideas pop into my brain whilst doing it)
2. Putzed about on the internet... which I said I wouldn't do...
3. Checked RP comms/forums (but not posted, because, heh, I can at least uphold PART of what I said I was going to do, right? *wince*)
4. Got a bunny for my merry_smutmas fic... after which, I sat down and have written FIVE SENTENCES of BAD fic for.

Then I proceeded to stare at the document and repeat steps one through three again.

I might have to use my nano trick of going to Borders so I don't actually have internet access to write. *sigh* I do actually have to go shopping so that will at least get me out of the apartment to do said shopping, won't it? *double sigh* I don't want to get dressed...

I think I over-zapped my lunch. (Ha! Lunch? I just woke up!)

So, today I MUST write. I must force myself off the internet and write. No RP, nothing until I get at least a couple thousand words of fic out. I've got four fic deadlines in relatively quick succession starting the end of next month and it would be nice if I could get off my ass on that collab with innerslytherin so we could finish it within a year of starting *griiins*, so I need to get cracking. Just need to keep telling myself that it doesn't matter if what comes out of my brain right now is crap, because I have time to fix it. Won't have that freedom if I procrastinate. ;)

Only, I have no bunnies. Crap. Maybe if I just start, teh bunnez will come.

As long as I'm here, I'm gonna put in a plug for an RPG I just started playing in. GJ based, mostly DH compliant (Hogwarts centered), the players that are most active are raring to go, the "school year" has JUST started, and the mods are lovely and collaborative. *grins at them* Plus, I know most of you who are reading my journal, outside of the Blades folks, got here originally for teh Snupin, and there is a snupin story there (Yes, withing DH canon. Shaddup. Teh boyz are not exactly happeh, though I think a bit of an unspoken understanding has occurred...) *g* Students (right now, Ravenclaws are in particularly bad shape, comparatively) and teachers (heh, emphasis mine) would be lovely, if anyone is interested! Oh, and so far there's only one slash pairing, so it's not an omgeveryone'sghey!rp. ;)

( Mockery rpg ad )